She is aliveeee ....

Sooo.. hi! Yes I know I havent, but please, let me explain. No I'm not making up excuses but. Ok fine... whatever! *hangs up*

He he... xD that was waaay funnier in my head (everything is funnier in my head, it just gets really messed up once I type/say/do it).

I haven't written in quite a while, but I sort of promised my self I wouldn't write anything sad or depressing and for some reason lately I can not be not depressing.

I'm almost 17 and I've done nothing with my life. My grades aren't getting any better. I miss a friend. I lost a friend. I got a half, it moved, lost it, it's already got another. The world sucks. People are dying. There are hungry kids everywhere and I've done nothing.

That's what bugging me the most; I'll turn 17 in a couple months and I've done nothing with my life. I always dreamed of changing the world, touching lives, making a difference. To the day I have achieved none.

But hey! This is supposed to be a happy post!!!!! Sooo I'll tell you about something that's got me well exited!! I (might) go to Africa (to a small village near the Kilimajaro(Tanzania)) this summer! (more on that later when all the bureaucracy and boring stuff are over)

I was going to do the one vicky did but... it waaaaay too long for mee!

01.What's the last TV show you saw?
Uh the news on Tuesday..

02. What are you wearing at the moment?
My pjs a.k.a. an XXL t-shirt and some reaaalllyyyy old pj pants

03. Favorite Song of the Moment?
Uh, hard to say... but I'm going to say Her Morning Elegance love the song, and it's been revitalised by the vid.

04. What is your favorite scent?

Petrichor,almond oil, and vanilla,

05. What's your occupation? What do you do there?
I'm a student uuuh like study suposedly...

06. What do you drink the most?
Water.

07. What is your favorite restaurant?
I'm more of a home-made food person, but I guess the veggie place donwtown

08. What will you be doing after finishing this?
I'll try to do the essay I'm supposed to turn in on Monday.

09. What did you want to be when you grew up?
Everithingist I was going to be the first person to do everithing... How ironic.

10. Your favorite romantic movie?
I find episode II (as crappy as it might be for a sw movie) a very romantic film.

11. What's the least favorite thing about yourself?
Me.

13. What are your ideal qualities in a novel?
Gosh, idk, I depends on the genre I guess, but not so much, gee this is much harder than I expected it to be.

14. What time do you usually go to bed?
At various times, from 7 to 11.

15. What's the meaning behind your username/name/nicknames you go by?
It's one of the first anagrams I ever made, and It anagrams to my name... quite proud of it.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (if u hate run on sentences don't read this)

Ok, so, I sent a picture of the cake we made for John Green and well, at first we tought it wadn't made it in the video, and then we saw it and we yelled sooo hard the hole school heard it! But we watched it in my iPhone, so we weren't able to se de video description, so we went to the cec to re wach it and well... we won the nonexistent nerdfighter prize of the day!!!1 omg omg omg.... sooo that's it... I'm so exited I'm so proud I'm soo happy, it's so jokes! omg omg

Goodbye 30 year old John....

Soo... Happy bday John!!! You are awesome!!!!!

I <3 you

Ok... so one things for certain....

Yay! omg a post! so I've decided this will be the more, eh, important blog. And I'll (later today) create the other crappy rambly one xD

to the square...

Lol... so I've realized I'm very rambly and whatnot... and sometimes I have a hard time posting something because it's too serious or because it's too silly. So I've decided I'm making a second blog... so I'll have this... which I'll call the crappy silly one... and the other one will be the cold serius one.
Because apparently I'm a control freak who's mental and messed up, and I need a tad bit of order in my blog... I know!? me? order? in something? wtf xD
Ok... so It is still on the works and I haven't made up my mind on how to divided them. If I should go all emotional and careless in one and all political and journalistic in the other, or go all rambling crazy in one, and go all planed and structured in the other. Which you my dear readers might think there is not much of a difference between the two options, but believe me there is!

Guess you'll find out soon... xD I must do my homework... on the weekend! which sucks... but whatever....

Omg! it's agust!

Yay! it's agust!!! I love Agust! It's just a great month, because it's near the end of the year, but not really and it rains!! and I LOVE rain.
I mean, if I could have rain's babies I would. Ever since I was little me an rain have been close, we have a special kind of relationship that no one really understands. Sometimes not even I undertand it xD. Rain is magical... it's simply made of awesome, and it couldn't be better, not even if it was made of some delicious substance, and we went ah aaah ah aaah ah aaaah.
I think that's disgusting, just imagine, it it was made of hmmmm... honey... everything would be sticky and gushy and gross! and plus, I don't like honey.
eh... so tomorrow I'll be staring a new semester! and that's sooo jokes! I love school! and and... I can't wait to se my friends, and my new teaches, and my new textbooks beacuse nothig can compare to the smell fresh-out-of-the-printing-place books. Well exept for the smell of old books, but really old yellowish books, those books that are so delicate that you are afraid you'll break when you turn the page.
Especially if you are anything like me. Everything I touch breaks, cracks, cries, yells, or dies (exept plants and animals, I'm great with plants and animals.. oh and bugs xD). Oh yeah... remember my mood ring? it broke, well it can be fixed, but I no longer have a soldering iron thingy (yeap I broke it), the part that holds the glass separated the part that goes around my finger. How? you ask... well I honestly don't know, that's why most of my teaches nicknamed me "the destroyer". I mean, I not delicate at all, I'm the definition of clumsy, I'm forgetful, I'm a mess, I'm stubborn and I stutter (ok so idk why I added that but I did xD), so it kind of comes natural, (breaking things).
Oh and I found my piggy! My oh-so-lovely piggy! It's this beautiful stuffed animal, and it's a pig, that walks and does the thing I do when I laugh, but when he does it it's adorable, not disgusting. =D
I haven't cheked my e-mail in ages soo I have about 200 mails to read and I really really don't want to. xD. Because I know most of them are spam, and I hate spam! I hate forwards and I hate /love mail that is not personalized, like the newsletters you subscribe to be informed of the latest whatnot.
Oh and I also have to translate the tourist guide for my lovely state, and I'm supposed to get paid for it. And when I get the money I'm determined to buy pre-order the paperback edition of An abundance of Katherines, so I can have the "nice" book and the highlighted, underlined, coffee spilled book xD.
Oh yeah... an talking about books! I can't wait 'till Breaking Dawn Arrives! I pre-ordered it about two months ago, and On friday they told me that they had sent it! SOOO! It should be arriving any day know! How exiting! yay!
Oh.. think this is already rambled enough, and well crappy enough soo I'll leave, but! not for loong. xD

No peace...

Arg! I'm mad-sad-frustrated!!! (What a surprise xD) The string thingy on my necklace broke!! TT my oh-so-lovely necklace that I never take off... I have to buy a new stringy or something.

I feel so omg... "naked" without it! I have the habit of "playing" with it every time I'm nervous/blissful/talking to the guys who gave it to me/fearful/etc.

Yesterday this gal told me she liked my writing. ttytt she made my week! I don't usually take compliments so seriously, (that's mostly because all the compliments I get are from close friends &/or family). Particularly when they are about the way I write, and my works (lol it sounds so grow up xD). Giving that friends and family are (in some sort of twisted way, giving you fake confidence)"obligated " to tell you your work is great, or that you look god, and all that jazz. Which sadly is a thing I can't do, giving that I'm terrible at all things related to being insincere with those who I love/appreciate the most.

That's why it meant so much this time, because who read the article and the short story isn't really someone I call friend. I've know her for a long time, but to tell the truth we have never liked each other. She knows she is not my favorite person and I know (believe me I know) I'm not her favorite person.

So yeah... someone likes my writing! Wooho! Yay! Someone mental, but still someone! xD

Omg so that’s all folks!

Go visit http://aiwwaf.blogspot.com she's made of awesome

omg tag xD

Soo, random facts about me. Mmmm.... dunno I'm a pretty boring person, so... dunnoo 3 facts... mmm...

I know ternary, binary, & grey code, and learning hex
My toes are abnormally large
I can easily write backwards (sometimes I don't even realize I'm doing so)

omg! I tag alana! so she'll be forced to make a blog! muahahahaha (she provably won't even read this xD)

Why?!?! Why do you insist on freaking sending people here!? stooop it!! arg!

omg! I love moood rings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm sooo happy! I just found my mood ring! and I adore my mood ring!
Ok, so it's not my original mood ring, that one I'm pretty sure it's lost forever in the infinity of my old back garden. Which is what happens when your feet grow, and your steps don't mach the original steps on your treasure map, 'cause you are a freak of nature and only are 5'5" and your feet are 11 (wo).

Mood rings are phenomenal, or at least I find them phenomenal. I have been intensely attracted to them since I was about 4 years old. Back then it was the closest thing to actual magic I had I guess. I was mesmerized by that little "diamond like" stones (yes those were my words according to the embarrassing story behind my deep adoration of mood rings).

I still love mood rings, they make me uncommonly happy. I still don't understand why. I guess that in almost all great moments of my life I have worn a mood ring. An plus the jokiest stores/museums/fairs/people have mood rings.

They are part of one of my biggest frustrations. My I-was-born-in-the-wrong-era frustration. No offense to my generation, but we all are kinda decepticons. We are (mostly) filled with indifference. We have a terrible fashion sense, I mean look at the 70's & 80's that was fashion dude! xD That was music (sorta), those were hair do's, those were toys, those were movies, those were tv shows! 'cmon! Next, Pimp my ride, super sweet sixteen, gossip girl?! those are our shows?! I mean BG was nothing on STO... it's good but not as good. The best SW movies were made in that era.

Side note; I have only meet one person who loved mood rings as much as I do, but he know grew out of them. And he turned out to be a quite not-some person. I'm soo afraid I'll grow up too and my heart will die... I don't want my heart to die! get the reference? if you doo I luv you!

fyi I'm yellow right know, though for the last 12 hrs or so I have been "horny" xD lol... yep... mood rings are so bizarre

Ok... so I include a the lyrics of a song about emotional girls & mood rings, which I honestly adore, 'cause we've proven that not even that helps... xD
Mood Ring- Relient K

We all know the girls that i am talking about
Well they are time bombs and they are ticking
And the only question's when they'll blow up
And they'll blow up
We know that without a doubt
Cause they're those girls,
Yeah, you know those girls that let their emotions get the best of them

And i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
Let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
So we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
Cause we'll know just what they're thinking, just what they're thinking
She's so pretty but she doesn't always act that way
Her moods are swinging on the swing set almost everyday
She said to me that she's so happy its depressing
And all I said was someone get that girl a mood ring

If its drama you want then look no further
They're like "The Real World"
meets "Boy Meets World"
meets "Days of Our Lives"
And it just kills me how they get away with murder
They'll anger you then bat their eyes
Those pretty eyes that watch you sympathize

And i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
Let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
So we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
Cause we'll know just what they're thinking, just what they're thinking
She's so pretty but she doesn't always act that way
Her moods are swinging on the swing set almost everyday
She said to me that she's so stressed out that it's soothing
And all I said was someone get that girl a mood ring

Cause when it's black it means watch you back because you're probably
the last person in the world right now she wants to see
and when it's blue it means that you should call her up immediately
and ask her out because she'll most likely agree
and when it's green, it simply means that she is really stressed
and when it's clear, it means she's completely emotionless
(and that's alright, i must confess)

We all know the girls that I am talking about
She liked you wednesday, but now it's friday and she has to wash her hair
and it just figures that we'll never figure them out
first she's Jekyll, then she's Hyde... at least she makes a lovely pair

mood ring, oh, mood ring
oh, tell me, will you bring
the key to unlock this mystery
of girls and their emotions
play it back in slow motion
so i may understand the complex infrastructure known as the female mind

(Huh, that was terrible)

I feeel like crap...

I just bought (well my grandma gave me) an iPhone.... So, yeap.... I just wasted a bunch of money on a cellphone. They haven't given me the actual thing, 'cause they ran out of them, but "they'll call me as soon as they arrive, provably next Tuesday".

My (old) cellphone worked fine. It was a bit busted, but I liked him. He had been with me for about two years now. Which is a lot, considering the way I treat my electronic devices. Ask anyone who knows me, really. My computer, my iPod, my camera, my phone, my watch, my t.v., my game boy, my palm, etc. most of them are dead now, and it's all my fault. Really I treat them like crap.

I didn't really needed a new phone, and it's not like I deserve it or anything. I did pretty crap last semester, and well I'm not a great daughter/friend/granddaughter/person-in-general.

And plus, I just (about two months or so) bought an iPod touch, so... I mean it's not like I needed a new electronic device to mess up.

The Italian Job (2003)

John Bridger: How are you?
Charlie Croker: I'm fine.
John Bridger: Fine? You know what "fine" stands for, don't you?
Charlie Croker: Unfortnately, yeah.
John Bridger: Freaked out...
Charlie Croker: Insecure...
John Bridger: Neurotic...
Charlie Croker: And Emotional.
John Bridger: You see those pillars over there?
Charlie Croker: hat about them?
John Bridger: That's where they used to string up thieves who felt fine.
Charlie Croker: After you.

yet another pointless post, and I still don't learn not to write while I sleep

I just reread yesterday’s post. I wish I could delete it, but sadly I think it needs a place out side my mind, so I’ll leave it up there. As some sort of reminder of how fugging weird I am when I feel sleepy xD. Ok so this post will probably be even more.... cukoo but, at least I have some sort of distraction.

I ordered some books about a month ago and they finally arrived! Yay! I got them on thursday. The same day I started reading Looking for Alaska by John Green. Sadly I finished it later that day. And It made me love John even more (I didn’t really tought it was possible). And on friday I started An Abundance of Katherines (by John Green obviously xD) and since then I’ve been trying to read it really slowly so It will last a bit longer. Well it didn’t really work, I’m already rereading it. I finished it officially at 11:23 a.m. I kind of hate that, I hate that I can’t make the reading process last longer when it is a book I like, sure rereading a book is lots of fun, and it helps you notice the details you missed the first time.

But there is something about the first time you read a book, the first time you turn page 111. The first time you see yourself forced to bend the cover so that you can actually read the pages without making some weird maneuvers. There is something about that little damage you did to the upper corner of the page you didn’t/but did want to read because you knew what was gonna happen, the felling you get after the damage is done, that horrifying feeling; that I-disrespected-the-author/publishing company/editor/tree/whatnot feeling, it’s simply amazing.

Ok so, I’m sleepy and tired again, and what I wrote doesn’t make sense. But as a great friend told me, “If you wrote it it’s because, at that moment you felt like it was important to capture it in some bizarre way.” And he is right. I do this for myself, to look back on it one day, and say, “Gosh, I was _____(right now it would provably be dumb)”

Not about frequency, not about quality.....

(FYI [Not about quantity, not about quality.... ] was the original title...)
I was definitely not made for blogging... xD can you tell? I post really often, and well it's not about quantity... right? It's not about quality either.... but... hey! I get b- for effort... xD

So... life has been a bit crappy at the moment, nothing mayor. Well, not nothing mayor, but nothing I'm not used to. And I don't know if that is right. Don't get me wrong, my life is pretty fantastic. I'm healthy (just don't make me run/go up many stairs), I have an amazing family, food on my plate every day, great friends, all my limbs, and more matherial things than most people in the world. And it sound horrible, but that is what keeps me going, what keeps me from breaking down. (It doesn't sound horrible now... but...)

Last night I saw an ad in the tv. I'm one of those weird cases of people who "watch the tv". By this I mean, I don't really watch the series/cartoons/news/whatever, I stare at the tv, I rearly ever pay attention to it. I spend my time daydreaming. It pretty much goes like this; I turn on the tv, I try to find something that is, not entertaining, but, not boring(?); then I watch in the tv for about 5 min, and then pretend to watch it for 10 min. and then turn it off. But yesterday, it took me forever to find a pseudo-entertaining program, during my channel surfing and ad caught my attention, don't really remember what it was about. I staid on that channel for a while and then this ad (the one mention in the first sentence in this paragraph) came up. There was a montage of a poor family, and this female voice (who was supposed to be the mother shown in the pictures, but by her language and voice tone it was obvious it wasn't[how stupid do the people who do the ads think we are? they do that all the time, do they really think we don't notice?!?]) and she said something in the lines of "I hope we can get something to eat TODAY, tomorrow? don't even ask me. I just hate that all I can give them (her two daughters 7ish and 3ish) sometimes is a piece of bread for both." much better said, longer, and well just better. It made me cry. Pouring, really.

It made me fell stupid, because I'm worrying about really silly things. This people worry about how they will survive another day. I worry about why someone doesn't speak to me anymore, or why someone had to go. What the hell is wrong with me!?

Another somewhat related story... just... for.. fun...(?)

About six months ago I went to the capital with mi uncle (who if you must now, is one of the closest persons in my life, more like a best friend than an uncle), went there to go buy something don't remember what (it was a present for someone if I recall correctly), and on our way back we got stuck in traffic, we moved a meter per hour (not really but it seamed that way at the time).

He is one of those persons who (unlike myself (believe or not)) doesn't like silence.

So we ended up talking about the weather, the news, the light, the man with the donkey that used to pass by our house and didn't pass no more, why wearing glasses was jokes, why it wasn't, and then, I don't know how it came up but, we started to speak about Bill Gates. (I'm a mac user by the way, and I don't hate windows, even if I like to make people believe I do, which I really don't. I care little about the matter.) And somehow the fact that Slim (Carlos Slim) had been recently (not really) named the richest man alive by forbes magazine.

He appeared to be content with the situation (He said something in the lines of “So, isn’t it good that Slim is over Gates.”). Thing that disturbed me deeply. So I asked him to elaborate. He said that it was a great honor that the riches man alive was a fellow mexican. And then I exploded. It is very hard for me to understand how can a country so pour have the richest man alive. It’s very disturbing. He said well he helps some charity organizations. Okay... does he give half of his monthly income to charity? I don’t think so! I don’t understand how he can sleep at night. Why does he need all the money he’s got? No offense but I doubt he will live for long. And he’s family is provably already covered for the next fifty years. I buy an iPod and feel like hell because it’s a waste of money, and this guy arg! It just made me extremely upset. I got so upset I got moist eyes, and then, I started swobbing, and he just tried to comfort me. But it’s something that is constantly on my mind.

I sometimes have trouble sleeping if I bought an unnecessary thing that day. Or if I spent too much money in something that I could have bought cheaper. Maybe it’s just me... maybe I’m insane or something.

Ok.. that was a bit pointless, and unnecessary. Thank god no one reads this! sorry for all the mmm... lack of vocabulary and eloquence, but I’m really sleepy but I needed to get some stuff out of my chest (and that’s just the tip of the iceberg).

A bit of ranting anyone? If you read all of it, you are amazing. I’m sorry if I made you waste about 5 minutes of your time.

Mmmm... fell like I’m forgetting something.... guess it’s not important n.n

Sooo tired!

side note; I love how I open a parenthesis to (acording to myself) just say something quick about the matter but not as important and the I just want to explore that subject.

dysfuctional is sooo jokes, it's a compliment xD

Yay! hi world... I've been busy, not... but hey! I went on a trip... so I have a not so crappy excuse xD

So I was doing a post on how to start a blog, but got bored and didn't finish it, and then I found a survey I tought was interesting, but got tired about three questions in... but O promes I will finish at least part one of the survey... someday xD

Yaay!! I was surfing the interweb... and found a geek test, to prove how geeky you are, I had onece done one in spanish... I did it... not so long ago, about seven months ago. I scored ok... but I scored great in this one...

here is a pic..

(damn blogger won't let me uplode it... imagine it xD)

Yep as you can tel by the imaginary image....

I'm a

BTW.. dysfunctional geek is over geek god

My score was %76.5286 yay! snaps for me!!

Me & the love of my life....

Isn't he cute?

All the girls are so jealous! They all wish they had him! but he is mine! oh yeah!!
I get to sleep with him every night ~_o!
He is way better than most men because (just the highlights)....

• He hears me out, & doesn't jump to crazy conclusions.
• He isn't overly sensitive.
• He is funny.
  
• He is fuzzy.
  
• He keeps me warm.
  
• He is loyal.
  
• He is ALWAYS there for me, not only when he needs me! and not only for five minutes but all the time I need him!
  
• He lets me stare at him, and doesn't feel uncomfortable.
• He doesn't try to figure out what I'm thinking all the time.
  
• He gets that if I say I'm ok! I'm ok! (and doesn't keep asking me how I feel every five freaking minutes)
• He is on team ninja!
  
• He doesn't mind if I don't feel like hugging him.
  
• He knows I kinda like being insulted, but not really.
  
• He doesn't try to make me feel bad for insulting him; he knows I'm jk.
  
• He accepts my messiness.
  
• He gets that sometimes I just want to stay at home and read a good book (or even a crappy one).
• He gets that I sometimes like crappy movies and doesn't make fun of me because of that, or at least not every hour on the hour.
  
• He is happy even if he doesn't have the biggest place in my heart, he thinks it's great he has a place, and apriciets it, and takes care of it as if it was the
  
• He doesn't think it's gross to make tofu sandwiches with peanut butter, ice-cream, & sometimes carrots,
  
• Kids adore him
• He knows the difference between friendship and relationship.
  
• He doesn't mind about my you tube addiction.
  
• He doesn't make me feel like crap when I bite my lip/ nails or I play with my hair by telling me how annoying it is, or how it just proves I'm nervous/ insecure (blah, blah, blah)
• He's not grossed out by the fact that I can fit almost half my foot in my mouth,
  
• He isn't a jealous guy; he lets me speak with whom ever I what to for as long as I want to, and he doesn't check my cell phone to see who have I texted.
  
• He (i'm pretty sure) loooves the fact that I can't tell a lie, cause I end up felling like crap, and doesn't take it as a sing of weakness, or of "crapiness"
• He looves food
  
• He is famous (kind of)
• He is from Asia,
  
• And last but not least he is made out of 15% Poliester, 85% Acrilic and 500% awesome

yep... you-know-who is this clear enough? or is it still on "girl code" and c'mon It's me you are talking about! I don't read between the lines, how do you expect me to write between 'em!? gee! You aree sooo smart jet soo dumb!

Not really

Ok... so life doesn't suck... life rules xD life... is better than the other option, so I guess It's all right.
Eh... here is an example of why life doesn't suck! Stuffed animals! yay! I loove 'em

Isn't it looveeely? Isn't it wonderful?

It's cuter in person! (He/she (not sure haven't checked) is not very photogenic! (like his/her owner xD))

ah... so life doesn't suck... and yep.. I'm totally bipolar xD... not really...

I just realized, that my first three posts kinda prove how emo I am xD... but I'm not....
Go check out awesome is what we aim for & Alone In La Vida they are made of awesome!! DO IT! GO! those blogs are waaaay better than mine! so go! *pushuck*˚

˚thats a whip by the way... That means I'm drop dead serious!

Life sucks

“Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a new dog, you get remarried, you owe ten million dollars in medical bills but you work hard for thirty-five years and you pay it back and then -- one day -- you have a massive stroke, your whole right side is paralyzed, you have to limp along the streets and speak out of the left side of your mouth and drool but you go into rehabilitation and regain the power to walk and the power to talk and then -- one day -- you step off a curb at Sixty-seventh Street, and BANG you get hit by a city bus and then you die. Maybe.” ~ Denis Leary

Life sucks... think you should know... nothing will be o.k.!, life doesn't give you lemons it gives you sh*t....

We came alone to the world and we will die alone! nothing can change that, no one. You are destined to suffer your entire life, you will neeever be happy, you can be something close to happy but you will never be!

You will always fall in love with the wrong person, a friend, a stranger, a guy who seams perfect and doesn't knows you exist, your friends ex, your friends brother, blah blah blah.

Just when everything seams right something will mess up your life, your friend gets amnesia, your father dies, your best friend/uncle/ someone you really love moves to a different country, blah blah blah.

and all you can do is keep the illusion of a brighter future alive...

Well here you go! hope you guys are happy!

I don't really feel like writing. Honestly I would rather eat cow's baby (xD not really) than write another mediocre post. Plus! There are a million things I should be doing instead of this, practicing feakeng carousel so David could stop bugging me about it!, sleeping!, passing Episode IV, finish the scarf I was knitting, finish the celt knot thingy of the pillow I'm making, tiddy up my room so they can paint it, etc. But I have veeeery pushy and... not-some [a.k.a. the opposite of awesome] friends that ask me to post something new. (jk! they are the awesomest XD guys ever!, eh or something XD!)


,
I don't understand why they want me to write. I'm a terrible writer. Don't get me wrong, I loove to write (poems, short stories, short novels, plays, etc), but I don't think they are any good. And even though I've written lot's of poems, stories, etc, find it really hard to write. I constantly go back and decide that what ever I wrote isn't good enough. And end up rewriting it, and not liking it.

You could say I'm a perfectionist, in a weird way. Not in everything I do, but on things I think matter. Things that saldy people around me do not care about. It’s one of my many flaws.

Since I truly have nothing better to do and this post is going down hill I’ll list my some (too many too list 'em all) flaws,
[‘cause I’m awesome like that xD]
I’m clumsy, veeery clumsy
I fall easily
I’m self absorbed
I’m a dork (yes it can sometimes be a flaw!)
I have two left feet
I kind of suffer from schizoid’s, but not really...
I’m mean, and cruel to people
I don’t take compliments well
I get distracted easily
I’m indecisive
I’m very sarcastic
I sometimes offend people and I truly don’t realize it
I’m shy
I tend to put people on pedestals and believe they are perfect, and once I discover they are not, I think it’s my fault (sounds crazy, know)
I’m slow, both mentally and physically
I have terrible spelling & grammar xDD
I’m a coward
I can be a bit of a hypocrite sometimes
I never or almost never tell people how I feel
I spend most of my time day dreaming, but I never do something to make the dreams come true
I set unrealistic goals
I generally want what I can’t have
I’m inpatient
I’m a glass half empty kind of person
I’m not sporty AT all!
I’m lazy
I can't handle losing
I’m forgetful
I can’t keep a friend too long, mmm... well let me rephrase that, when I say I’ll keep intouch, I’m socially awkward
I’m not a nice person
I care to much
I never start a conversation unless I'm great friends with someone and sometimes find hard to keep a conversation with people I’m not friends with
I tend to push people away
I’m extremely insecure
I never finish anythi

An introduction... [of some sort]

Ok so this is my fist post [How exiting *sarcasm*] I’m not sure what I’ll be writing about, but I’m quite sure it won’t be very interesting.

This is not really an introduction since I’m not presenting myself nor explaining what this blog will be about; but I will explain some things.

1. The domain. “A darker lilac”

Even though the background is black and in my profile picture I look taciturn [and a bit lethargic xD] I’m everything but “emo”.
Well, I would not consider myself as “emo”, or at least not what “emo” has transformed into. Because like every human being I’m emotional, I mean emotions are (supposedly) what sets us apart from the “primitive” life forms. The “conscience”.
Last semester in my second history class the professor mentioned something related to the topic. Something about how we are all just animals, and we all just look to survive, his point was to make a very scientific view of what we were, a “lucky” species that evolve to be the most “powerful” one.
One of my classmates interrupted him and said that we are by far superior from all the other species because we “think before we act” (his word not mine), and “unlike the lion that hunts and kills the zebra” cause we [humans] are conscious of what we do, that zebra we kill is provably a “mom or a dad “ and “has a family to take care of”. I tough this was one of the most hypocritical remarks ever made in that class room. This guy claims he is superior to Lion because he thinks before he acts, and he is able to recognize that Zebra has a family blah, blah, blah. Well if this guy realizes that Zebra has a family, what about the cow he eat on sunday? Cow’s family isn’t as important as Zebra’s? It’s ok for us to kill Cow because we think about the “pain” we cause to Baby Cow? In that case sure we are “smarter” than Lion, but in that case we are by far meaner and more evil than I ever thought humans could be.
Any ways [sorry for getting so off track] the domain is not a way to express my “emotisticy”, but in a way it [sort of] express my awesomeness. A darker lilac is an anagram of my first name and my last name.

2.“Work in progress”
It’s a working title, or so I think. But there was a bit of thinking behind it.
I like to think of myself as a something not completed. I often find myself stepping back and “looking into me” and 90% of the times I don’t like what I see. In that way I’m a work in progress, a draft. There is so much I want to accomplish (an so little time) [how cliche] jet I feel like I’m just starting to lay down the basis, I'm preparing the land, so I can latter on plant the seed. But then I think of the day I stop evolving; The day I accomplish all that I want to acomplish. Then what? Then what would my purpose will be? Though quite frankly I still don’t understand what my purpose is. Why am I here? Why is anyone of us here?


Sooo, I’ll post soon hopefully (if I remember), oh and thanks for reading this!! I’m sure that there are about a gaziillion joker things you could doing. xD

NFTBA

Side Note: Visit http://aiwwaf.blogspot.com/ xD we are both starting out new blogs!! check her out she’s made of awesome!!

Also don’t forget to leave a comment and let me know what you think, and Why do you think you are here? What’s your purpose?